Not the Adventure I Wanted but Glad I Went

Oh no I can’t get it up

Come on ,push harder it’ll work with a shove.

The ramps too steep and I don’t have the power

No I can’t get out and walk up ,I’m disabled flower !!

Never thought I’d be climbing a mountain to get on a train

I need an electric wheelchair that’s all terrain.

At last …We’re on and parked in our space

My son shouts out “What’s that smell!” with a frown on his face.

Although conveniently situated is space we have

Is right by the toilet so the whole journey smells bad.

We arrive at our station, I’m worried about getting off.

Why aren’t the ramps longer no more adventure please I’ve had enough.

I slid down the ramp like tony hawk on his skateboard

Hard to control, but impressive where’s my round of applause.

I start to relax thinking the next stage is easier

Pavements in comparison are a heck of a lot flatter.

Out of the station I gasped with dread

Give it an hour I think I’ll be dead !!!

The pavements are cobbled with no lowered Kerbs

For fuck sake it’s 2020 things should be accessible it’s absurd!

It’s pitch black and I’m having to drive on the road

A cars coming towards me ,I have nowhere to go.

Trying to stay calm as my kids are with me

Feeling anxious now and needing a wee.

The cobbles don’t help they hurt to drive over

My body in pain, where is my future grandsons baby shower??

Ducking under bushes like we’re on Bear grylls

We were having a laugh too but I could have been killed.

Got to the baby shower we all had and amazing night

Celebrating the imminent birth of my grandson, i can’t wait.

Party’s over we set off , the journey back to the station filled me with dread

Some good news ,my train replaced by a bus I can’t access so they’ll get me a taxi instead.

I just drove right in and sat in the back

Driven straight to my front door I couldn’t ask for better than that.

We pulled up and the kids got out first

Come on mr taxi driver open my door so I can reverse!!!

I’m so tired and I really want to go to bed

This challenging journey has given a sore head.

He’s pulling the handle but nothing is happening

I’m locked in the taxi you’ve got to be joking.

I really thought he was taking the piss

It could only happen to me this.

He called his boss and asked for advice

Can we put the heating on ,I’m turning to ice !!

Kids are inside watching the tv

I can’t believe this is happening to me.

His boss called back and said call roadside assistance

They are sending someone out but at the moment he’s some distance

I started laughing when they mentioned calling the firemen

It would be hilarious if I’d have to be cut out by them

My eldest son brought us a brew

Then I had a thought, what if I need to use the loo

I don’t know why but I laughed even more

At the thought of just wetting myself all over his floor

Three hours later the roadside assistance arrived

I was so glad that I held my bladder as he had to get close and lay on the floor by my side

He took off the panel and fiddled with the lever

It had come apart he fixed it what an amazing geezer

The back door was open and I was finally set free

I think the taxi driver was also really happy to get rid of me

Going to the baby shower was totally exhausting

It was scary but we survived we’ll feel better in the morning.

Joanne Quinnell

Me stuck in the taxi !
Journey there
Pre flustered look !!
My new grandson.